we're all having a great time.
The Westword Showcase Awards Wrap-up blog post, dudes
Wow.
This just proves the old adage/children’s book title-
“If you nominate a mouse for an arbitrary award based on a ballot system passed around between a bunch of bars that also have music sometimes and then have a really fun all day festival where they play alongside their peers and then like a month later award the bands (also mice) that brought the most people to fill out another set of ballots, then some of the other mice that didn’t win the award and their under-age mice girlfriends will bitch on your message board about the entire system being somehow fellatio based and also they will want some milk.”
And this is what the mice people (not Josephine & the Mousepeople, who deservedly won their category and our hearts always) had to say:
Obvioulsy{sic} the metal award sucked, and the place cleared out after that miserable failure… This is the problem with letting the radio listening public vote on independant{sic} music. KBPI listners{sic} screwed this thing up by submitting a ballot based on their crappy taste in music. Horse is not the worst metal band in denver, but they are worst metal nominated band in the category. Yet they won, becasue uncle nasty is on the radio during the drive home. Now these shithead listeners/voters arent going to see the name of the real best metal band in denver orinted in westword{all sic}. Theyare going to go on believeing that horse is the bast denver has to offer, and that is a crime. Instead of paying 10 bucks at the larimer to see Taun Taun and have their faces purified, they are going to spend 20 bucks at ecks saloon to see horse, for the 50th time, and have their ballbags mildly vibrated{really sic}. i honestly cant believe horse had the nerve to accept that award. also, no offense to black lamb, they kill it, but it would have been nice to see some new blood get rewarded, like kingdom of magic. turn off your radio denver.
-”muggermackye”
I think this might be a “correct” assessment. Not sure who “Uncle Nasty” is, but our Ranger training teaches us to stay far away from people who refer to themselves as ‘uncle anything.’ Really unsure about people who call themselves ‘Nasty‘ but also that might be an ironic choice.
Thinking that maybe that we could seize an opportunity here to be a “green blog” and encourage people to turn off their radio and reduce their carbon footprint.
“muggermackaye” brings up an interesting point. Democracy dosen’t work because “listeners/voters” are usually “fucking retarded.” (draw your own conclusion about politics here)
WOW, TO THE LOVERS AND HATERS THANKS FOR EVERYTHING!
-”UNCLE NASTY”
OK! WE LIKE THE IDEA OF IRONIC CAPS LOCK!
We need to accept the idea of both ‘LOVERS’ and ‘HATERS’ w/r/t “UNCLE NASTY“-and that these ‘LOVERS AND HATERS’ are diametrically opposed. The LOVERS and the HATERS manage to co-exist somehow for years without having A NUCLEAR LEVEL STRUGGLE IN THE COMMENTS SECTION OF A BLOG POST RECAPPING THE AWARD CEREMONY OF AN ARBITRARY AWARD BASED ON A BALLOT SYSTEM PASSED AROUND BETWEEN A BUNCH OF BARS THAT ALSO HAVE MUSIC SOMETIMES.
funny that some of these bands would be popular enough to win their categories considering they play less than 10 shows a year…..
there were some really great, working bands on these ballots in various categories that draw really well around the denver area and have nice sized fanbases, playing 100+ shows a year……. and still lost out to bands who play one a month…
just seems fishy how these results come in…..
-”PDizzle”
Well, obvs. All people everywhere know that products are aesthetically judged based on how readily available they are. That’s why everyone loves Budweiser so much. Because it is always there. And cheap.
Westword, you are a fucking joke!
Why do the same people get nominated year after year? Given, there is SOME talent in your nominations, it seems more like you all play favorites with people who continue to suck your Thrifty Nickel ballsack of bullshit.
… I’m going to have an awards show for the people who suck my dick the most. I’ll be sure to include nominations for clients who spend shit tons of money with me too, simply to ensure they come back to daddy with a pocket full of gold coins.
Let’s face it, you’re just a classified ad magazine with a few articles thrown in for good charm. Thank God Regis is around to keep your coffer full, or you’d be suffering the fate of the Rocky Mountain News. I’m not too worried though, you’ll be an internet only thing in a couple years, then it will be even easier to bend you over.
Lastly, there are three thing I hate about Denver – Westword, that stupid sculpture of a horse by DIA, and when the tranny hookers on Colfax don’t swallow.{sic}
-”Ron Nickel”
So mean! There are some talent in these nominations! That much Ron is Right about! This will learn them!
Not sure who this ‘Regis‘ guy is. This is the first post to propose some sort of sex favor-for-vote arrangement. Regis must be excellent at fellatio, and he must have gold coins. That’s a pretty weird thing to have.
Good job to the public for always voting for the worst possible band in almost every single category or voting for the SAME BAND every single year.
Whose dick do I have to suck to get some awesome bands in this thing? Ok, fine, I will suck off the DIA horse…
-”Eye Roller”
Is that all it takes? We at SBINA are desperate for attention. Felatio seems like a pleasant alternative to “talking to people,” “making sure bar owners know who we are,” and “building listenership.” Kind of jealous that these other bands figured out the system before us.
Maybe we should learn from this. The Excutive Branch of Safe Boating is No Accident Industries need love too.
We would like to take this opportunity to announce the nominations for the 2009 SBINA Revelatory Awards.
The nominees are:
Something Underground, Born in the Flood, Epilogues, Yerkish, Speakeasy Tiger, The Rouge, Ian Cooke, The Photo Atlas, Rob Drabkin, The Wheel, Lyin’ Bitch and the Restraining Orders, Solar Bear, Eyes Fall Open, Horse, Black Lamb, Clinging to the Trees of a Forest Fire, UmConscious, The Pirate Signal, FOE, Ron Miles Group, The Informants, Demon Funkies, P-Nuckle, The Hollyfelds, Paper Bird, Zebra Junction, Josephine & the Mousepeople, Dragon, DJ AWhat!,and Hot to Death.
SO BASICALLY it will work like this: if you won a Westword showcase award and want to compete for the penultimate award in all of the Denver metro area, we are open to bribes of either a fiscal or sexual nature. This is in no way a measure of your virtue as an artist or performer, this is a prize award given to whomever is willing to bribe us. We need money, and we are lonesome. Hit us up on Face-Book.
Yours always,
LP
VP of Nautical Promotions
Blogs
Westword Music Showcase Awards Wrap Up
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| David Barber |
| John Baxter and Matty Clark in the flesh |
See more photos at westword.com/slidehow.
The picture above pretty much tells the tale of last night’s Westword Music Showcase Awards — drunk and debaucherous. Everyone (well, we think everyone — we didn’t exactly take a formal poll or anything) had a pretty swell time. Hugs were smiles were plentiful, as was the booze that flowed freely before the ceremony kicked off. There were a few miscues, but all in all everything went off without a hitch. Special thanks to all the folks who graciously presented awards on behalf of Westword (Cory Casciato, Tom Murphy, Mark Bliesener, Dutch Seyfarth, Chris K., Jake Schroeder, Laura McGaughey, Jon Solomon, Quibian Salazar-Moreno, Josh Mullen, Ben Davis, Mike Bartsch, Rev. Jim Norris, Jon Solomon, John Baxter, Chris Callaway, Rhett Lee, Jim McTurnan, David Barber, Dan Rutherford, Alf, Lynne Ryan and Adam Lancaster). See the list of winners as voted on by the readers after the jump. Feel free to offer congratulations or commence to grumbling. Have at it.
2009 Westword Music Showcase Award Winners
01. Rock – Something Underground
02. Indie Rock – Born in the Flood
03. Modern Rock – Epilogues
04. Progressive Rock – Yerkish
05. Pop – Speakeasy Tiger
06. Indie Pop – The Rouge
07. Avant Pop – Ian Cooke
08. Electro/Dance Punk – The Photo Atlas
09. Singer-Songwriter – Rob Drabkin
10. Folk/Acoustic – The Wheel
11. Punk – Lyin’ Bitch and the Restraining Orders
12. Post-Punk - Solar Bear
13. Hardcore – Eyes Fall Open
14. Metal - Horse
15. Drone/Stoner Metal – Black Lamb
16. Death/Grind Metal – Clinging to the Trees of a Forest Fire
17. Hip-Hop Band – UmConscious
18. Hip-Hop Group – The Pirate Signal
19. Hip-Hop MC – FOE
20. Jazz – Ron Miles Group
21. Blues – The Informants
22. Funk – Demon Funkies
23. Ska – P-Nuckle
24. Country - The Hollyfelds
25. Roots/Americana – Paper Bird
26. Jam/Improv – Zebra Junction
27. Ambient/Electronic – Josephine & the Mousepeople
28. DJ Dance – Dragon
29. DJ Hip-Hop – DJ AWhat!
30. DJ Non-Traditional – Hot to Death
Yikes – the denver post poll was just released too…
http://www.denverpost.com/commented/ci_12856744?source=commented-entertainment
Last year this is what prompted me and so many other musicians to discover the ctrl-F “find” function.
Hah! We’re tied with a misspelling of Speakeasy Tiger. Nice!
While we regret the Speakeasy Tiger misspelling a mystical, dreamlike passion, we also realize that corralling more than 300 bands is a task better suited for left-brained, stat-lovin’ types — at least moreso than the good-natured, music-loving, writerly types glued to their keyboards at the Denver Post. (Not an excuse, juss’ sayin’… stats may not be our strongest point, but we do check and re-check our poll results very carefully).
Crap just happens, and for that we are truly sorry. Case in point: We accidentally left Tom Murhpy off the voters list for two years (of all people!) so this year we let him write the ballot. Next we’re changing the name of the poll to the Speakeasy Tiger Memorial Denver Post Underground Music Poll and Good Tymey Jamboree Hoedown Fixins’. That, or Dan Kaufman’s Bane.
Er… that should be “WITH a mystical, dreamlike passion…”
wow. we haven’t met (yet), but i think i love you.
Awesome!
Hi, I’m Leighton. I like long urban hikes, espresso, and songwriting. Want to be blog friends and then real life friends?